Hedonism, Be Wicked For A Week

June 12, 2017

 

 

Linda Linda Linda Listen!  Lol

 

So I really thought that I would've said hello by now.  My last blog entry was October 2016.  Shame, shame!  Hopefully you would've noted that I started writing poetry and you've been enjoying those posted on the site.  I'll actually be performing two of my pieces on 6/21 @ 7p at the Amarachi Restaurant in Brooklyn and my body will be a canvas for an artist (#Dope).  Not to mention keeping up with the podcasts on the next tab (Season Finale this Wednesday).  Regardless of the timing, I don't think you'll mind me skipping what I've been up to since October, to tell you all about my Hedonism trip. 

 

 

 

Lort!  But where should I start?  Let's start with two definitions.  As the Universe would have it, while ON the trip on May 28th, Dictionary's word of the day, was none other than...yep you guessed it, hedonism!  Which is defined as: "devotion to pleasure as a way of life."  Next term I would like to define is 'fuck fest.'  Now, something told me Merriam wouldn't have this definition so I had to head over to the Urban dictionary for some help.  I mean, I know what the term means to me but when writing a blog, I like to be as accurate as possible.  The top definition of fuck fest is: "can be an orgy or just a shitload of sex between two people."  Welp!  Please keep those two definitions in mind.

 

 

 

 

 

Now, I was born and raised in Jamaica so I've heard of Hedonism in hushed tones.  I heard it again as an adult around four or five years ago when a classmate of mine, who has become a very close friend, invited me to go.  Finance has always been an issue so I didn't make it. Each year she made plans to go she would invite me and each year I would just watch it on my bucket list and say, next time.  

 

I'm still fairly new to Facebook and last year, I'm scrolling along my dry ass timeline (TL) when BAM I saw something that made my kitty jump!  Lort!  I 'liked' it and scrolled on by.  Then this continued happening. Each time I would see a picture or a post that made my heart leap, pulse increase, kitty jump, saying awwww, laughing my booty off or even leaving me pensive at times. What is this place, that had me so eagerly checking my TL, hoping to see something fun?  A place where folks seems so free to post whatever body part(s) or what's on their minds?  Then I saw people doing introductions and it would appear based on the responses that these folks know each other!  Finally I thought to click on the title after 'Shy Davis>.'  Welcome everyone to The Worst Behavior Tour (WBT) Facebook Group.  Ran by the Fabulous, hardworking, no bullshititng, sweetheart, about her Benjamin but cares more about your safety and fun experience, Ms. Kitty Roberts aka Travel Butler Extraordinaire!! *applause please* Yasss! 

 

 

 

Now this was my very first Facebook group. I wasn't ready y'all.

 

 

 

Turns out, after last year's trip, Ms. Roberts decided to start a Facebook group in order to expand her brand. Wise move Kitty, wise move.  My girlfriend who was constantly inviting me, added me to the group.  Fast forward to me enjoying the group and networking.  I was trying to make a decision on attending the trip.  My only hang up was the cost of the trip.  As I've mentioned, I'm from Jamaica so to pay $185 a night plus airfare had me squeezing my eyes and curling my big toe and saying 'nah.'  *deep sigh* 

 

Then there was a 30 second post.  A post where you can drop any...ahhh provocative picture, audio or even video. LORDT!  Y'allllll I saw some things that will forever be ingrained in my mind.  I will never forget, this tall light skin model dropped a pic of his...anyway.  It was a beautiful sight that had me moist in more areas than one.  Well shit, if he's going on the trip then my brown ass need to be there too!  Just to admire him of course (of course!).  I kindly slid into Kitty's inbox, asked for her Paypal info and sent my $100 deposit IMMEDIATELY.  And that folks, is what I call marketing!  When I tell you I lost my whole lunch hour and night looking at this post. Sway!

 

 

So we've been posting, laughing, sharing, adding folks and you realize that this is a community.  Folks who have been on the trip the previous years, sharing fun moments, posting pics, hinting at inside jokes and you're like dang, this is fun.  Friendships are being built and networking is happening.  I'll keep it real.  We're adults. So of course if you've been vibing with someone on posts and then in the inbox and then numbers are exchanged, it's highly possible that MTA is going your way or ticket is about to get booked!  Meh, shit happens.  Just in case that isn't your thing, then there's always the Meet and Greets.  A majority of folks from the group, at the time (the group is so large now, I haven't kept track) were from Atlanta and New York so what did Kitty do?  She arranged events in these cities.  I flew down to the one in Atlanta last August and I attended the one in New York last September.  It was such a PLEASURE to meet some of these folks face to face.  You're going to Hedonism so being the good business woman that she is Kitty made some of her events...adult based.  Nope, not going into any more details.  Join the group, pay your deposit for the trip and experience ish for yourself.  All imma say is that I had a BLAST in Atlanta.  It was great getting down to Jamaica and seeing some folks I knew from the meet and greets and others who were on my list that I was DYING to meet like Mr. Taiwan! 

 

 

 

 

 

I told you I'll keep it real, and real I shall.  Beloved, catfishing is real.  I QUICKLY learned that some folks are great with these filtered apps and know their angles well.  Meanwhile, I'm over here disliking makeup, don't know shit about filters and still learning how to take a damn selfie!  When the NY Meet and Greet came around, I threw in the mother loving towel.  I really REALLY wanted to drink heavily, but the headache I had at the time prevented that.  I was like, who ARE you?  After the initial shock, I mingled and still had a good time.  Slowly folks were paying their deposits and being added to the 'WBT PAID' group.  As the main group grew, I participated more in the paid group.  I'm stingy.  You didn't pay your deposit then I'm not showing nuffin!  Clearly I was mad.  LOL!  

 

 

However, there were some reverse catfishing.  Meaning, some folks looked scrumptious in person than their pics. 

 

 

 

Let's move on a bit.  Besides being accosted by the beautiful scenery that is Jamaica, once you arrive at the resort you're greeted by friendly staff members offering you a glass of rum punch.  Lemme warn you about the rum punch.  I took one sip and it went from my lips straight to my cooch.  I kindly slid it to my roommate for her to have.  Yeah, I'm good on that.   I read enough in the group that it will have you on your ass rather quickly.  You've been warned my friend, you've been warned!  You're also greeted by one of Kitty's friendly staff with a gift bag.  In it are various items from a water bottle for staff to fill all the way up with alcohol and or water (HYDRATE PEOPLE!) to condoms.  Listen, Kitty got you!  If your room isn't ready then hopefully you paid attention in the paid group where she will advise you to pack a swimwear in your carry-on tote so you can head to the pool or beach while you wait.  Don't want to do that?  Fine, explore the grounds, people watch, have some food or drinks, or just stay in the lobby in the comfy orange couch under the fan and enjoy the breeze.

 

 

 

 

As the date of the trip approaches there will be posts of the various excursions that would be available and the deadline to pay;  ATV, zip lining and more. Unfortunately due to recovering from an injury prior to the trip, I didn't participate in any excursions but be sure to sign up and have some fun!

 

 

 

She also posted about the different theme nights that will be going down; Toga, Villian, Pajama Party and more.  To date she has not repeated a theme night so each year is fresh and fun!  This is your time to go over the top with your creativity or in my case do very little.  Sorry y'all this isn't my area of expertise, so I did very little and hoped it worked.  I must say my favorite night was surprisingly Carnival night.  I lost all interest in attending any carnival event around the world and to get dress up for this had me in a state.  I really didn't want to step out but my very good friend and roommate encouraged me to come out and I'm so glad I did.  Folks SHOWED OUT!  I wasn't mad at it.